One of the two rovers thought to be probing the surface of Mars is actually in Oklahoma, just four miles from Lawton city limits, NASA scientists learned today.

“Apparently, it never left Earth’s atmosphere at all, but accidentally touched down in Comanche County, just off [U.S. Highway] 277, around Sneed Acres,” said a NASA spokesman at a hastily arranged press conference. “Naturally, we are embarrassed by this discovery, but really, how were we supposed to know? All of the images and data it was transmitting were consistent with what we know of Martian terrain.”

“Except for this anomalous detail,” added an unnamed NASA scientist, “which image enhancement revealed to be the Fort Sill water tower.”

Despite the error, the space agency plans to continue collecting data. “Now that we know its location, we’re sending it west, to gather more images,” said the spokesman. “By our estimates, it should reach the Gold Dragon Lounge by Tuesday.”

In about a month, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences will announce the 2004 Oscar nominations. Can you guess which “one of the most powerful, commercially successful, and, by any measure, brilliant films of the year is being utterly rejected by the Hollywood elites this award season“?