Everybody’s talking about Ben Domenech today.

By “talking,” I mean “blogging.” And by “everybody,” I mean very few. Expressed as a proportion of the U.S. population, I mean almost nobody.

But in the fishbowl of political blogs, I mean just about everybody. So I am too, even though I don’t have much to say about Ben Domenech. I don’t get out much, and I’ve never heard of him before today.

Every man is a sinner, and I’m not here to cast stones at poor Ben. But I find the sin of plagiarism more fascinating than, say, embezzling.

There are some sins I understand, because I feel their temptation myself. If some official is caught embezzling, I can deplore his actions, but I do at least understand his motive. Thieves, fornicators, even murderers — I am somewhat acquainted with their impulses, if not their deeds.

But… plagiarism? What’s the appeal there? I could maybe see a reason to plagiarize a research paper, thereby avoiding weeks or months of work. But Domenech was plagiarizing fluffy little humor columns. And movie reviews! Why on God’s green earth would anyone even feel the slightest temptation to plagiarize a movie review? Why not just, you know, go see the movie, and then write down what you thought of it?

Imagine you were the Devil, whispering into the ear of a movie critic. Imagine you were trying to tempt him to plagiarize some other critic’s review (with some minor alterations) of the latest insipid James Bond film, instead of writing his own opinions. What words would you whisper? “If you use this other critic’s review instead of your own, you’ll gain… um… something. Just think of the… ah… stuff, you’ll get. Oh, just do it, okay? Please?”

I can only come up with two possible motives: either Domenech is insane, and plagiarized for no reason; or, he cannot write. I mean, cannot even make a coherent sentence by himself. That’s all I can come up with.

UPDATE: Driven by curiosity, I’ve just read lots and lots of Domenech’s writing — much of which I think he really did write — and I’m ruling out the “cannot write” hypothesis. Domenech can write. Moreover, he can write pretty well. He misuses “enormity” (e.g.) but that doesn’t make him illiterate per se.

That still leaves me with no explanation for his bizarre behavior.